**Trump Welcomes NCAA Champion Florida Gators to the White House: “I Love Gators, They’re Tremendous!”**
In a move that shocked absolutely no one, former President Donald Trump welcomed the NCAA Champion Florida Gators to the White House on Tuesday, declaring, “Gators are the best! They’re big, they’re strong, and they’re great at winning—just like me!”
The event, held in the Rose Garden, featured a lavish spread of fast food, including a suspiciously large number of alligator-shaped chicken nuggets. “I ordered the best nuggets, folks. You wouldn’t believe how many I got. They’re huge!” Trump exclaimed, gesturing wildly as he accidentally knocked over a stack of Gatorade bottles.
Head coach Billy Napier, clearly overwhelmed by the occasion, remarked, “This is a dream come true! I mean, who wouldn’t want to be here with a guy who once said he could shoot someone on Fifth Avenue and still get elected?”
Star quarterback Anthony Richardson added, “I thought we were here to meet a real alligator. I’m a little disappointed, to be honest. I was ready to wrestle one!”
In a bizarre twist, Trump then unveiled a new line of merchandise: “Make Gators Great Again” hats, which he claimed were “the best-selling hats in the history of hats.”
As the event wrapped up, Trump concluded with a heartfelt message: “Remember, folks, if you can dodge a gator, you can dodge a bullet. And if you can dodge a bullet, you can definitely dodge the media!”
The Gators left the White House with a trophy, a lifetime supply of Gatorade, and a promise from Trump to personally coach their next game—“I’m a natural, believe me!”
