**Trump Visits Capitol Hill to Advocate for Major Legislation: “It’s Gonna Be Yuge!”**
In a shocking turn of events that left political analysts scratching their heads and the rest of us rolling on the floor, former President Donald Trump made a surprise visit to Capitol Hill yesterday to advocate for what he called “the most tremendous legislation ever.” Sources say he arrived in a golf cart, wearing a “Make Congress Great Again” cap and a suit that looked suspiciously like it was borrowed from a mannequin at a discount store.
“I’m here to make deals, folks,” Trump declared, waving his hands like a conductor leading an orchestra of confusion. “We’re talking about legislation that will make America great again—like a giant wall made of gold! Who wouldn’t want that?”
When asked about the specifics of his proposed legislation, Trump replied, “It’s simple! We’re going to ban all vegetables. They’re just sad little plants trying to ruin our burgers. And we’ll replace them with bacon. Lots and lots of bacon. It’s gonna be yuge!”
Senator Chuck Schumer, who was caught off guard by Trump’s unexpected visit, responded, “I thought he was just here to play golf. I didn’t realize he was trying to turn Congress into a barbecue joint.”
Meanwhile, House Speaker Nancy Pelosi was seen frantically Googling “How to deal with an ex-president on a bacon-fueled rampage.” She later commented, “I thought we were done with this. I mean, who knew he could just waltz in here like he owns the place?”
As Trump continued to pitch his “Bacon and Freedom” bill, aides reported that he was also considering a proposal to replace the national anthem with “Y.M.C.A.” because “it’s a real crowd-pleaser.”
In the end, the visit concluded with Trump leaving behind a stack of “Bacon for America” flyers and a promise to return next week with a new plan to make Congress even more entertaining—possibly involving a reality show format. “I’m thinking ‘Survivor: Capitol Hill,’” he said, grinning. “Let’s see who can outlast the filibuster!”
As the sun set over Capitol Hill, one thing was clear: whether you love him or hate him, Trump’s visits are always a spectacle—and possibly a health hazard.
