**Trump Targets Chinese Student Visas Amid Rising Spy Concerns: A New Chapter in International Espionage**
In a move that has left the world scratching its head and wondering if they accidentally tuned into a reality show, former President Donald Trump has announced a bold initiative to target Chinese student visas. This comes amid rising concerns that these students might be spies, or worse, just really bad at math.
“Look, folks, we can’t have these students coming over here, learning our secrets, and then going back to China to teach their friends how to make a mean Kung Pao Chicken,” Trump declared at a recent rally, where he was flanked by a giant inflatable panda. “I mean, what’s next? They’ll be teaching them how to build a wall? We can’t let that happen!”
In a shocking twist, Trump’s new policy will require all Chinese students to pass a rigorous “American Culture” exam, which includes questions like, “What is the capital of the United States?” and “How many times can you say ‘freedom’ in a single sentence?”
“I’m just trying to protect our great nation,” Trump continued, “and if that means denying a few thousand students the chance to study here, so be it. Besides, have you seen their math scores? They’re practically spies already!”
Meanwhile, the Chinese government has responded with a statement that can only be described as “confused.” “We thought they were just here for the education,” said Wang Ping, a spokesperson for the Chinese Ministry of Education. “Now we have to worry about them being spies? What’s next? Are we going to start checking their backpacks for secret spy gadgets?”
As the world watches this bizarre saga unfold, one thing is clear: the only thing more confusing than Trump’s policies is the idea that a Chinese student could be a spy. After all, if they were really spies, wouldn’t they be better at hiding their identities?
In the end, it seems the only thing we can all agree on is that the real espionage is happening in the cafeteria, where students are secretly trading their lunch for a taste of freedom fries.
