**Trump Fights Back in Court Over Harvard’s Foreign Student Visa Controversy: A Legal Showdown for the Ages!**
In a move that has left legal experts scratching their heads and comedians rolling on the floor, former President Donald Trump has officially entered the courtroom to battle Harvard University over its controversial foreign student visa policies. The case, dubbed “The Great Ivy League Showdown,” promises to be a spectacle of epic proportions, complete with legal jargon, questionable wigs, and possibly a cameo from a confused squirrel.
“Harvard is letting in too many foreign students,” Trump declared during a press conference held in front of a giant inflatable version of himself. “I mean, who needs all those smart kids when we have American students who can barely spell ‘visa’? It’s a disaster!”
In a surprising twist, Trump has enlisted the help of his new legal team, which includes former White House advisor Kellyanne Conway and a parrot named Mr. Squawks, who is rumored to have a law degree from a very prestigious online university. “We’re going to win this case,” Conway stated confidently, “because if there’s one thing we know, it’s how to make things up as we go along!”
The lawsuit claims that Harvard’s foreign student visa policies are “unfair” and “too smart for their own good.” Trump’s legal team argues that allowing foreign students to study at Harvard is akin to letting a raccoon into a gourmet restaurant. “Sure, they might be cute and clever, but they’ll just end up stealing the silverware!” Mr. Squawks squawked, flapping his wings for emphasis.
As the case unfolds, Harvard has responded with a statement that reads like a poorly written sitcom script: “We welcome all students, regardless of their country of origin. Unless they’re from Florida. We have enough trouble as it is.”
Legal analysts predict that the trial will feature dramatic courtroom scenes, including Trump dramatically waving his hands and shouting, “You’re fired!” at the judge, who will undoubtedly be a former contestant on “The Apprentice.”
As the nation watches this legal circus unfold, one thing is clear: whether you’re Team Trump or Team Harvard, we’re all just here for the popcorn and the inevitable meme-worthy moments. Stay tuned for updates, and remember, in the world of politics, the only thing more unpredictable than a foreign student visa is Donald Trump in a courtroom!
