**Tragic Shooting Incident Claims Life of Georgia Tech Student at Upscale Apartment Complex: A Comedy of Errors**
In a shocking turn of events that has left the Georgia Tech community reeling, a tragic shooting incident occurred at the upscale “Luxury Lofts of Atlanta,” where students pay more for rent than most people do for their college education. Witnesses report that the incident was sparked by a heated debate over the best pizza toppings, which escalated faster than a freshman’s GPA after finals week.
“I was just minding my own business, trying to enjoy my artisanal avocado toast, when I heard someone yell, ‘Pineapple belongs on pizza!’” said local resident and self-proclaimed pizza connoisseur, Chad “The Dough Master” Thompson. “Next thing I know, there’s a guy in a Hawaiian shirt pulling out a water gun filled with ketchup. It was chaos!”
The victim, identified as 21-year-old Timmy “Toppings” Johnson, was known for his passionate stance on pizza. “He was a good kid,” said his roommate, who wished to remain anonymous but insisted on being called “The Pizza Whisperer.” “He once argued for three hours about the superiority of pepperoni over sausage. I guess he really took that debate to heart.”
Authorities are still investigating the incident, but sources close to the scene report that the real tragedy was the loss of a perfectly good pizza party. “We were all set to celebrate National Pizza Day,” lamented local pizza shop owner, Luigi “The Slice” Romano. “Now, we’re just left with a bunch of sad, soggy slices.”
As the Georgia Tech community mourns the loss of a fellow student, one thing is clear: never underestimate the power of a pizza debate. In the words of Timmy’s favorite professor, Dr. Cheesy McCrust, “Life is like a pizza; it’s all about how you slice it. Just don’t bring a water gun to a pizza fight.”
In the wake of this incident, the university has announced plans to implement mandatory pizza etiquette classes. Because if there’s one thing we can learn from this tragedy, it’s that no one should ever have to die over a topping dispute—unless it’s anchovies.
