**Tragic Incident: Infant Fatally Attacked by Puppy While Parents Slept**
In a shocking turn of events that has left the nation reeling, a local infant was reportedly fatally attacked by a puppy while the parents were blissfully snoozing through the chaos. The incident occurred in the sleepy town of Barkington, where the only thing more dangerous than a puppy is a parent who thinks they can sleep through anything.
Witnesses say the puppy, a 10-pound bundle of fur named Sir Barksalot, was merely trying to play fetch with the baby’s rattle when things took a tragic turn. “I mean, who knew a puppy could be so… enthusiastic?” said neighbor and self-proclaimed dog whisperer, Mildred Sniffles. “I thought it was just a game of tug-of-war, but apparently, it was a game of life and death!”
The parents, Tom and Linda Snooze, were reportedly unaware of the unfolding drama. “We were just trying to catch up on our sleep,” Tom explained, still groggy from the night before. “I mean, who knew a puppy could be so… *puppy-like*?”
Local authorities have launched an investigation into the incident, with Chief Barkley stating, “We’re looking into whether this was a case of puppy aggression or just a misunderstanding. After all, it’s not every day you see a puppy take down a baby. It’s usually the other way around!”
In a bizarre twist, Sir Barksalot has been placed in a “puppy rehabilitation program” where he will learn the importance of gentle play. “We’re teaching him that not all toys are chewable,” said his trainer, Fido McFluff. “And that babies are not chew toys, no matter how tempting they may look.”
As the town mourns the loss of innocence, experts are warning parents everywhere to keep a close eye on their sleeping arrangements. “If you think your puppy is harmless, just wait until you see them in action,” said Dr. Woofington, a leading canine behaviorist. “They can go from cuddly to chaotic in a matter of seconds!”
In the end, the Snooze family has vowed to stay awake from now on, while Sir Barksalot has become an overnight sensation, with offers pouring in for a reality TV show titled “Puppy vs. Baby: The Ultimate Showdown.” Because if there’s one thing America loves more than a good tragedy, it’s a good reality show.
