In a groundbreaking move that has left educators and students alike scratching their heads, the National Association of Physical Education (NAPE) has officially mandated that all high school students must complete a TikTok dance challenge to pass their Physical Education class. The decision, announced during a press conference held in a gymnasium filled with inflatable flamingos, has sparked a wave of confusion, excitement, and a few spontaneous dance-offs.
High School PE, TikTok Challenge
“Let’s face it, traditional sports are so last century,” said NAPE spokesperson and self-proclaimed TikTok influencer, Chad “The Dance Machine” McFlurry. “Why run laps when you can run the ‘Renegade’ while simultaneously filming it for your 12 followers? It’s all about engagement, people!”
The new curriculum, dubbed “PE 2.0: Dance Edition,” requires students to master a series of viral TikTok dances, including the “Savage,” the “Woah,” and the ever-elusive “Toosie Slide.” Failure to perform these dances with the appropriate level of enthusiasm will result in a failing grade, much to the dismay of students who thought they could coast through gym class by simply pretending to stretch.
“I thought I could just sit on the bleachers and scroll through TikTok like I always do,” lamented junior Sarah “The Couch Potato” Johnson. “Now I have to actually *do* the dances? This is a nightmare! I can barely walk in a straight line, let alone do the ‘Blinding Lights’ challenge!”
In an effort to prepare students for this new reality, schools across the nation are hiring TikTok coaches, who are reportedly being paid in avocado toast and likes. “I used to teach basketball, but now I’m teaching kids how to floss,” said former PE teacher and current TikTok coach, Coach Barry “The Flossinator” Thompson. “It’s a tough transition, but I’m just glad I can finally wear sweatpants to work and call it ‘professional attire.’”
Parents are also feeling the heat, with many expressing concern over their children’s newfound obsession with dance challenges. “I thought I was raising a future doctor, but now my kid just wants to be the next Charli D’Amelio,” said concerned mother Linda Johnson. “I mean, what’s next? A TikTok cooking class? I can barely boil water!”
Despite the chaos, some students are embracing the change. “I’ve always wanted to be famous, and now I can do it while getting a PE credit!” exclaimed senior Jake “The TikTok King” Thompson, who has already amassed a following of 300 on the platform. “I just hope my mom doesn’t find out I’m using her phone to film my dances. She still thinks I’m studying for the SATs.”
As schools prepare for the upcoming semester, one thing is clear: the future of physical education is here, and it’s dancing its way into the hearts (and phones) of students everywhere. Whether this new approach will lead to healthier lifestyles or simply more viral videos remains to be seen. But one thing is for sure—if you can’t dance, you might as well just sit down and scroll.
