**Texas Sheriff Reports Significant Drop in Illegal Crossings as California Migrant Center Closes: “We Just Put Up a Sign!”**
In a shocking turn of events that has left experts scratching their heads and conspiracy theorists high-fiving, Texas Sheriff Buck “The Law” McGraw announced a significant drop in illegal crossings at the Texas border. The reason? The recent closure of a California migrant center, which Sheriff McGraw claims was “a magnet for all things illegal, like a barbecue joint in a vegan convention.”
Sheriff McGraw, who is known for his love of both donuts and dramatic press conferences, stated, “We just put up a sign that said, ‘Welcome to Texas: Now with 50% Less Illegal Activity!’ and poof! The crossings dropped faster than a cowboy’s pants at a rodeo.”
Local rancher and part-time philosopher, Cletus “The Thinker” Jenkins, added, “I reckon folks just realized they could get a better deal on boots and BBQ in Texas. I mean, who wants to cross the border when you can get a brisket sandwich and a cold beer right here?”
Meanwhile, California Governor Gavin Newsom was seen sipping a kale smoothie while declaring, “We’re just trying to keep things chill, man. If they want to cross into Texas, let them! We’ve got enough avocado toast to keep us busy.”
In a bizarre twist, a group of illegal crossers was spotted attempting to enter Texas while wearing cowboy hats and boots, claiming they were “just trying to fit in.” One of them, who identified himself as “Tex Mex,” said, “We heard the BBQ is better, and we wanted to see if the rumors were true. Spoiler alert: they are!”
As the dust settles and the BBQ smoke clears, one thing is for sure: Texas is ready to welcome anyone who can appreciate a good brisket, even if it means crossing the border with a side of humor. Sheriff McGraw concluded, “If they keep coming for the BBQ, we might just have to start charging admission!”
