**Study Reveals 742 Unmarked Graves in Virginia, Including Confederate Soldiers: Experts Say They Were Just “Hiding from the IRS”**
In a shocking revelation that has left historians scratching their heads and local ghost hunters polishing their EMF detectors, a recent study has uncovered 742 unmarked graves in Virginia, including those of Confederate soldiers. Researchers from the University of Virginia’s Department of Historical Shenanigans stumbled upon the graves while searching for the lost socks of Thomas Jefferson, which they believe may have been buried with him.
Dr. Ima Grave Digger, the lead researcher, stated, “We were just trying to find out where all the missing socks went. Turns out, they were hiding with a bunch of guys in gray uniforms who were really just trying to avoid the IRS.”
Local resident and self-proclaimed “grave enthusiast” Bob “The Bone Collector” McGee expressed his excitement: “I always knew there was something fishy about that field! I thought it was just a bad place to plant tomatoes. Now I’m thinking of starting a tour company: ‘Ghosts of the Tax Evaders!’”
The study also revealed that many of the soldiers were buried with their prized possessions, including a collection of Confederate currency that is now worth about as much as a used napkin. “I guess they really believed in the ‘lost cause’—and by that, I mean their financial planning,” quipped historian and amateur comedian, Sally “The Skeptic” Smith.
As the news spreads, local businesses are already cashing in. “We’re launching a new line of ‘Confederate Ghost Tours’ that include a complimentary ‘Confederate Currency’ souvenir,” said local entrepreneur and part-time fortune teller, Crystal Ball. “It’s a win-win! You get spooked, and we get rich!”
So, if you’re in Virginia and hear the faint sound of banjos or the rustling of old uniforms, don’t be alarmed. It’s just the spirits of the past trying to avoid their tax returns—forever.
