**South Carolina Mass Shooting: Investigation Launched as Hospitals Treat Victims, and Everyone Wonders Where the Free BBQ Went**
In a shocking turn of events that has left South Carolina residents both bewildered and hungry, a mass shooting occurred last night at the annual “BBQ and Blues” festival in downtown Charleston. Witnesses reported that the chaos erupted just as the headliner, the legendary band “The Grilled Cheese Experience,” was about to take the stage.
“I thought it was just a really intense guitar solo,” said local resident and self-proclaimed BBQ connoisseur, Bubba “The Sauce Boss” Jenkins. “Turns out, it was a whole different kind of ‘smoke’ in the air.”
As hospitals scrambled to treat the victims, many were left wondering about the fate of the festival’s famous pulled pork sandwiches. “I came for the music and the meat,” lamented festival-goer Linda “Lettuce Wrap” Thompson. “Now I’m just left with a bad taste in my mouth and no BBQ to wash it down!”
Authorities have launched an investigation, with Sheriff Hank “The Meatball” McGraw stating, “We’re looking into all leads, including whether this was a case of mistaken identity or just someone who really hates coleslaw.”
Meanwhile, local conspiracy theorist and part-time magician, “Mystic” Mike, claims he has a theory. “I think it was a rogue group of vegans trying to sabotage the event. They probably thought they could turn the BBQ into a tofu festival. Spoiler alert: they were wrong!”
As the investigation continues, one thing is clear: South Carolinians are united in their quest for justice—and a side of mac and cheese.
