**Severe Tornadoes and Train Derailment Cause Widespread Destruction in Kansas: Locals Blame the Weather Gods for Their Bad Luck**
Kansas—home of the Wizard of Oz, endless fields of corn, and now, a new attraction: a tornado and train derailment combo that has left residents scratching their heads and wondering if they accidentally wandered into a disaster movie.
In a bizarre twist of fate, a series of severe tornadoes swept through the state, only to be followed by a train derailment that sent a cargo of rubber chickens flying through the air. “I always knew Kansas was a little wobbly, but this is ridiculous!” exclaimed local resident and self-proclaimed tornado expert, Bob “Twister” Thompson. “I thought I was going to have to chase down my lawnmower, but instead, I ended up dodging rubber poultry!”
Witnesses reported seeing a tornado pick up a train and toss it like a child’s toy. “It was like a tornado and a train had a baby, and that baby was a disaster,” said local farmer and part-time philosopher, Clara “The Tornado Whisperer” Jenkins. “I just hope the chickens land somewhere soft. They deserve better than this.”
As the dust settled, residents took to social media to express their disbelief. “I thought I was just having a bad hair day, but now I’m pretty sure I’m living in a cartoon,” tweeted local teenager, Timmy “Tornado Survivor” Johnson. “I mean, who needs a rollercoaster when you can just ride out a tornado?”
In the aftermath, the Kansas Department of Weather and Bad Luck issued a statement: “We’re doing our best to keep the weather in check, but we can’t control everything. We suggest everyone invest in a good helmet and some duct tape. You never know when a rubber chicken might come flying your way.”
As for the train? It’s currently being used as a makeshift shelter for displaced chickens, who are reportedly forming a union to demand better working conditions. “We just want to be safe and not end up as dinner,” clucked one particularly vocal hen, who wished to remain anonymous.
So, if you’re in Kansas, keep your head down, your helmets on, and your rubber chickens close. You never know when the next tornado-train combo might come rolling through!
