World’s First Time Machine Invented—Still Can’t Get Your Latte Right on Time

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Study Finds 75% of All U.S. Laws Could Be Rewritten as Memes

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Breaking: Biden Declares the Thanksgiving Turkey “Too White”, Plans To End Annual Tradition

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Marvel to Introduce 47 New Superheroes, Each More Confusing Than the Last

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China Releases Statement Confirming They Are Also Over The Whole Pandemic Thing

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Unemployment Rate Hits Record Low as People Just Stay Home and Sell Their Old Clothes

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Ghosts in Haunted Houses Now Demanding Wi-Fi Access

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Disney Announces Live-Action Remake of Water: “This Time, It’s Personal”

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Congress Just Added 10,000 Pages to the National Debt with New Tax Code, No One Can Read It

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Kardashians Launch New Line of ‘Faux Organic’ Water Bottles

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Local Meteorologist Finally Admits They Just Guess the Weather

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Celebrities Demand More Privacy, Then Immediately Post New Selfie With Caption ‘Just Woke Up’

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