Hockey Bros Get Permission to Skip Work for Olympics, Bosses Pissed

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Panthers Captain Realizes Winning Stanley Cup Once Wasn’t Enough, Now Aims for Threepeat – Because Why Not?

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Spoiler Alert: Trans Athlete Beats Crybaby Women in Cycling Race

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McMahon Slams Newsom with WWE Clip, Proves Title IX is Just a Game for Trans Athletes

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Comey’s Daughter Fails to Lock Up Diddy in Trial – Better Luck Next Time, Kid!

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FAA Teams Up with Southern School to Solve Air Traffic Controller Shortage – Because Who Needs Proper Training Anyway?

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Miracle weight-loss pills now double as headache cure!

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Astronomers Shocked to Find Object from Neighbors Outside Solar System

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Obama-appointed Judgey McJudgerson strikes down No Asylum for You, Illegal Immigrants! order by Trump. Cue the dramatic music!

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Democratic doctors’ protest against ‘beautiful bill’ ruined by pesky tourists at US Capitol!

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Trump tells faith leaders he could fix AT&T tech issues with just a ‘small loan of a million dollars’

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Knicks Hire Mike Brown Because Why Not?

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