Elon Musk Launches Mars Mission, Immediately Offers ‘Free Wi-Fi’ to Martians

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Survey Finds 90% of Thanksgiving Hosts Just Googled ‘How to Cook Turkey’ This Morning

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Thanksgiving ‘Food Coma’ Now Classified as a National Emergency

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Congress Passes Bill to Rename Thanksgiving: ‘Pre-Black Friday’ Shopping Day

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Influencers Accidentally Become More Popular By Actually Liking Products

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Brand Strategy Revealed: Slap ‘Sustainable’ on Anything, Profit Soars

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Not 72 Hours On Strike, North Pole Records First Lost Time Accident

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Snoop Dogg Launches New Fitness App: Doggedly Staying Lazy

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Union Workers Celebrate 12th Annual ‘We Tried’ Picnic After Negotiating With Management

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Local Teen Claims ‘No One Understands My Struggle’ After Spending a Day Without Wi-Fi

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China Celebrates Record Economic Growth While Handing Out Free Jobs to Robots

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New Study Shows Watching Sports on TV Burns More Calories Than Playing the Sport

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