National Police Union Expresses Robust Backing for President Trump’s ‘Big, Beautiful Bill’

National Police Union Expresses Robust Backing for President Trump's 'Big, Beautiful Bill'

National Police Union Expresses Robust Backing for President Trump's 'Big, Beautiful Bill'

**National Police Union Expresses Robust Backing for President Trump’s ‘Big, Beautiful Bill’**

In a stunning turn of events, the National Police Union has thrown its full support behind President Trump’s latest legislative endeavor, affectionately dubbed the “Big, Beautiful Bill.” This bill, which reportedly includes provisions for everything from taco trucks on every corner to mandatory daily naps for all citizens, has left many scratching their heads—and others rolling on the floor laughing.

Union President Chuck “The Badge” McGuffin stated, “This bill is so big and beautiful, it makes the Grand Canyon look like a pothole! We’re all in favor of anything that keeps our officers caffeinated and our donuts plentiful.” McGuffin went on to explain that the bill includes a provision for “free coffee for cops” and “unlimited donut holes,” which he claims will “reduce crime by 87%—or at least keep us awake during stakeouts.”

Meanwhile, Vice President of the Union, Linda “The Law” Lawton, added, “We’re particularly excited about the section that mandates a national ‘Dance Like Nobody’s Watching’ day. It’s about time we let loose and show the world that we can bust a move just as well as we can bust a criminal!”

Critics of the bill, including local cat owners and anyone who has ever been to a family reunion, have expressed concern that the bill may lead to an increase in spontaneous dance-offs in the streets. “I just don’t want to see my cat getting arrested for twerking,” lamented local resident and self-proclaimed cat whisperer, Gary “Whiskers” Thompson.

As the bill makes its way through Congress, one thing is clear: whether you love it or hate it, the “Big, Beautiful Bill” is sure to keep America entertained—at least until the next big thing comes along, like a national “Wear Your Pajamas to Work” day.

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