**Man Arrested for Supplying Alcohol to 20-Year-Old Injured at Pittsburgh Ballpark: A Case of “Brew-tiful” Misunderstanding**
PITTSBURGH, PA – In a shocking turn of events that has left the city’s baseball fans scratching their heads and their wallets, local man Chuck “The Keg” McGee was arrested this past Saturday for allegedly supplying alcohol to a 20-year-old fan who took a tumble at PNC Park. Witnesses say the young man, identified as Timmy “Two-Left-Feet” Thompson, was attempting to catch a foul ball when he tripped over his own shoelaces and landed face-first into a nacho stand.
“I was just trying to help him celebrate his near-catch,” McGee explained while being handcuffed. “I thought, ‘What’s a little beer between friends?’ I mean, it’s not like I was handing him a bottle of tequila and a skateboard!”
The incident escalated when Thompson, who was already nursing a soda-induced sugar rush, was seen chugging a beer that McGee had allegedly provided. “I thought it was just a really foamy root beer!” Thompson exclaimed from his hospital bed, where he was recovering from a nacho-induced cheese overdose. “I didn’t even know I was breaking the law! I just wanted to be the MVP of nacho diving!”
Local authorities were quick to respond, with Officer Betty “Buzzkill” Johnson stating, “We can’t have people supplying alcohol to minors, especially when they’re already in a state of nacho-induced euphoria. It’s a slippery slope from there to a full-blown hot dog eating contest!”
As McGee was led away, he shouted, “I’m just a guy trying to spread joy and beer! Is that a crime?” To which Officer Johnson replied, “Only if you’re not wearing a jersey!”
In a bizarre twist, the Pittsburgh Pirates have since offered McGee a lifetime supply of nachos in exchange for his “expert” advice on how to catch a foul ball without face-planting. Meanwhile, Thompson is reportedly considering a career in professional nacho diving, citing his “natural talent” and “unwavering commitment to cheese.”
As the dust settles on this bizarre ballpark debacle, one thing is clear: in Pittsburgh, the only thing more dangerous than a foul ball is a friend with a cooler full of beer.
