**French Open Prioritizes Human Judgment Over Technology, Djokovic Disagrees**
In a shocking turn of events, the French Open has announced that it will prioritize human judgment over technology in its officiating, leaving tennis star Novak Djokovic shaking his head so vigorously that he nearly dislodged his signature headband. “I thought we were past the Stone Age,” Djokovic lamented, “but apparently, the French Open is still using a crystal ball and a Ouija board to make calls.”
The decision comes after a series of controversial calls that left players and fans alike questioning the reliability of technology. Tournament director Jean-Claude “I’m Not a Robot” Dupont stated, “We believe that human judgment adds a certain je ne sais quoi to the game. Plus, our line judges have been practicing their dramatic hand gestures for years. We can’t let that talent go to waste!”
Djokovic, however, was not impressed. “I mean, what’s next? Are we going to have a mime as a line judge? I can already see it: ‘Out!’ *gestures wildly* ‘In!’ *pretends to pull a rabbit out of a hat* It’s madness!”
In a bizarre twist, the tournament has also introduced a new officiating system called “The French Way,” which involves players appealing to a panel of local café owners who will make calls based on the quality of the players’ croissant-eating skills. “If you can’t handle a flaky pastry, how can you handle a tennis ball?” quipped local café owner Pierre “The Croissant King” Baguette.
As the tournament progresses, Djokovic has vowed to bring his own “human” technology to the court: a trained parrot named “Racket” who will squawk out the correct calls. “At least he won’t be biased,” Djokovic said, “unless he’s hungry. Then all bets are off.”
As the French Open continues to unfold, one thing is clear: whether it’s human judgment or a parrot with a penchant for pastries, the drama on the court is about to get a whole lot more entertaining. Stay tuned for more updates, and remember, if you can’t trust a human, trust a bird!
