**Florida Congressman Proposes Renaming DC Transit to Honor Trump: “It’s Time to Make Trains Great Again!”**
In a move that has left political analysts scratching their heads and train enthusiasts rolling on the floor, Florida Congressman Chuck “The Train” McGee has proposed a bill to rename Washington D.C.’s public transit system to “The Trump Express.” The bill, which McGee claims is “the best idea since sliced bread and the only thing that can save America from the tyranny of boring commutes,” aims to honor the former president by transforming the Metro into a “gold-plated, luxury experience.”
“Why should we settle for mundane subway rides when we could be riding in style?” McGee exclaimed at a press conference, flanked by a group of supporters wearing “Make Trains Great Again” hats. “Imagine a train that serves only the finest fast food—Big Macs and fries on every corner! And let’s not forget the entertainment: live performances by Kid Rock and Ted Nugent on every trip!”
Critics of the proposal have been quick to point out that the Metro is already a chaotic experience, with delays and overcrowding. “Renaming it after Trump won’t change the fact that I’m still stuck next to a guy who smells like a combination of old gym socks and regret,” said local commuter Sarah “I Just Want to Get to Work” Johnson.
But McGee remains undeterred. “This is about more than just trains; it’s about making America’s public transit system great again! We’ll even have a special car dedicated to Trump’s tweets—every time the train stops, it’ll play a random tweet on loop. Who wouldn’t want to hear ‘covfefe’ while waiting for the next stop?”
As the bill heads to Congress, one thing is clear: whether you love it or hate it, the Trump Express is bound to be a ride you won’t forget—if you can find a seat, that is.
