**Five Arrested for Allegedly Assisting Escaped Inmates in New Orleans: A Comedy of Errors**
In a plot twist that could only be scripted by a team of caffeinated monkeys, five individuals were arrested in New Orleans for allegedly assisting a group of escaped inmates. Authorities say the suspects, who were apparently auditioning for a new reality show titled “Escape from the Big Easy,” were caught red-handed trying to smuggle the inmates out in a hot air balloon shaped like a giant beignet.
Local resident and self-proclaimed “escape artist” Chuck “The Houdini of NOLA” McGee was among those arrested. “I thought we were just having a little fun!” he exclaimed while being handcuffed. “I mean, who wouldn’t want to float away in a pastry? It’s the ultimate New Orleans experience!”
The mastermind behind this culinary caper, 32-year-old Brenda “Biscuit Bandit” Johnson, claimed she was merely trying to help the inmates “find their inner peace.” “I figured if they could just get a taste of freedom, they’d be happier,” she said, while munching on a beignet. “And what’s more freeing than a balloon ride? I mean, have you ever tried to escape in a car? Too many potholes!”
Authorities were tipped off when a local baker noticed an unusual spike in beignet orders. “I thought it was just Mardi Gras coming early,” said baker Louis “The Doughnut Whisperer” Dupree. “But when I saw them trying to attach a basket to a balloon, I knew something was up. I mean, who needs a getaway car when you have a pastry?”
As the investigation continues, the five suspects remain in custody, reportedly planning their next big escape—this time, with a fleet of inflatable flamingos. “We’re going to float right out of here!” Chuck declared, as he and his fellow inmates plotted their next move. “Just wait until you see our next balloon—it’s going to be a giant crawfish!”
In the meantime, the New Orleans Police Department is reminding citizens that if you see a hot air balloon filled with inmates, it’s probably best to call 911 instead of joining the ride. After all, freedom may be sweet, but it’s definitely not worth the calories!
