**Family Files Lawsuit Following Sheriff’s Deputy’s Death in Mobile Gun Range Fire: “We Just Wanted to Shoot the Breeze!”**
In a shocking turn of events that has left the community of Mobile, Alabama, both bewildered and bemused, the family of Sheriff’s Deputy Bob “Bulletproof” Johnson has filed a lawsuit following his untimely demise in a fire at the local gun range. The incident, which authorities are calling “a real hot mess,” has sparked a flurry of questions, not least of which is: how does a gun range catch fire?
According to Deputy Johnson’s family, the fire was ignited during a “friendly” competition to see who could shoot the most targets while simultaneously roasting marshmallows. “We just wanted to shoot the breeze!” exclaimed his cousin, Billy “Buckshot” Johnson, while holding a s’more in one hand and a legal document in the other. “Who knew that mixing firearms and fire pits was a bad idea?”
The lawsuit claims negligence on the part of the gun range, stating that “no one should have to worry about their deputy catching fire while trying to catch a break.” The family is seeking damages for emotional distress, as well as a lifetime supply of marshmallows, which they argue is a “necessary coping mechanism.”
Local gun range owner, Chuck “The Trigger” Thompson, responded with a chuckle, saying, “We thought we were just adding a little flavor to the shooting experience! Who doesn’t love a good s’more while blasting away at targets?” He added, “Next time, we’ll stick to hot dogs. They’re less flammable.”
As the lawsuit unfolds, the community is left wondering if they should be more concerned about the safety of their local gun range or the culinary skills of its patrons. One thing is for sure: Deputy Johnson’s legacy will live on, not just in the line of duty, but also in the annals of absurdity.
