**Environmentalists Sue to Block Trump’s Commercial Fishing Order in Pacific Monument: “Fish Have Rights Too!”**
In a shocking turn of events that has left both fish and environmentalists flopping in disbelief, a group of environmentalists has filed a lawsuit to block former President Trump’s latest commercial fishing order in the Pacific Monument. The order, which allows fishing in previously protected waters, has sparked outrage among those who believe that fish should have the same rights as, say, a well-heeled poodle.
“Fish are people too!” declared Greta Fin, a spokesperson for the group “Fish Rights Now.” “If we allow commercial fishing in the Pacific Monument, what’s next? Will we start serving sushi at the White House? Oh wait, that’s already happened!”
The lawsuit claims that the order violates the “Fish Bill of Rights,” a little-known document that was allegedly drafted during a secret meeting of fish activists in a local aquarium. “We believe that every fish deserves the right to swim freely without the fear of becoming someone’s dinner,” said Fin, who was last seen wearing a t-shirt that read “Save the Tuna, Eat the Rich.”
In response to the lawsuit, Trump tweeted, “I love fish! I love eating fish! I love fishing! But I also love the environment. So, I’m going to build a wall around the fish. They’ll pay for it!”
Meanwhile, local fishermen are preparing for a showdown. “I’ve been fishing these waters for decades,” said Captain Hook, a local fisherman who claims to have caught the biggest fish in the Pacific. “If these environmentalists think they can stop me, they’re going to need a bigger boat… or a better lawyer!”
As the legal battle unfolds, one thing is clear: the fish are swimming in murky waters, and the environmentalists are ready to cast their nets. Whether they’ll catch a break or just a bunch of seaweed remains to be seen. But one thing is for sure—this is one fishy situation that’s sure to keep us all hooked!
