**CBS News CEO Wendy McMahon Resigns as Trump Lawsuit Settlement Looms: A Hilarious Turn of Events**
In a shocking twist that has left the world of journalism reeling, CBS News CEO Wendy McMahon has announced her resignation just as a settlement looms in the highly publicized lawsuit involving former President Donald Trump. Sources close to the situation say McMahon decided to leave the network after realizing that “the only thing more unpredictable than Trump’s tweets is his legal strategy.”
In a statement that can only be described as a mix of Shakespearean drama and a bad sitcom, McMahon said, “I’ve decided to step down because I can no longer work in an environment where the news is more scripted than a reality TV show. I mean, who needs a script when you have Trump?”
Rumors are swirling that McMahon’s resignation was prompted by a particularly intense game of “Who Wants to Settle a Lawsuit?” during a recent board meeting. “It was like watching a bunch of cats trying to play poker,” said board member Chuck “The Negotiator” Thompson. “Wendy just couldn’t take it anymore. She said she’d rather wrestle an alligator than deal with another round of Trump’s legal shenanigans.”
As for Trump, he reportedly celebrated the news by tweeting, “Wendy was a great CEO, but I’m still the best at settling lawsuits. I could settle a lawsuit in my sleep—just ask my pillow!”
In the wake of McMahon’s departure, CBS News has announced plans to replace her with a goldfish named “Fluffy,” who is said to have a “refreshing take on current events.” Fluffy’s first order of business? A special report titled “Fishy Business: The Truth Behind Trump’s Hair.”
As the dust settles on this bizarre chapter in CBS history, one thing is clear: in the world of news, the only thing more unpredictable than a Trump lawsuit is the next headline. Stay tuned, folks!
