**Armorer Finishes Prison Term Following Tragic ‘Rust’ Set Shooting: Now Offering “How Not to Shoot” Classes**
In a plot twist that could only be scripted by Hollywood itself, armorer Hannah Gutierrez-Reed has completed her prison term following the tragic shooting incident on the set of the film “Rust.” Upon her release, she announced her new venture: a series of classes titled “How Not to Shoot: A Beginner’s Guide to Not Accidentally Shooting People.”
“I thought I was just supposed to make the guns look cool,” Gutierrez-Reed said in a press conference that was definitely not held in a gun shop. “Turns out, there’s a lot more to it. Who knew?!”
The classes, which will be held in a local community center, promise to cover essential topics such as “The Difference Between Props and Real Guns” and “How to Avoid Unintentional Celebrity Target Practice.” Gutierrez-Reed’s first student, aspiring actor and part-time mime, Chuck “The Silent” McGee, expressed his excitement: “I just want to learn how to hold a prop without accidentally auditioning for a role in the next ‘Law & Order’ episode.”
In a bizarre twist, Gutierrez-Reed has also partnered with local magician, David Copperfield, to offer a special segment titled “Now You See It, Now You Don’t: The Art of Disappearing Bullets.” Copperfield, who was reportedly confused about the whole situation, said, “I thought we were just making things disappear. I didn’t sign up for this!”
As Gutierrez-Reed embarks on her new career path, she remains optimistic. “If I can save just one life by teaching people how to not shoot, then I’ll consider it a success,” she declared, while accidentally pointing a prop gun at a nearby camera crew.
In the end, it seems that Gutierrez-Reed is determined to turn her misfortune into a comedic goldmine. After all, if you can’t laugh about it, you might just end up in a courtroom. And nobody wants that—unless you’re a lawyer, of course.
