In a shocking turn of events, President Donald Trump has issued a dire warning to the Senate: pass the historic bill or face a “whopping 68% tax increase” for all Americans. The threat comes as the Senate debates the controversial legislation that promises to overhaul the tax system and bring about major changes to the economy.
In a tweet storm early this morning, Trump wrote, “If the Senate fails to pass this bill, Americans will be hit with the biggest tax increase in history! Sad!” The President went on to say that the bill is crucial for the country’s economic growth and warned that failure to pass it would have disastrous consequences.
Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell responded to Trump’s threats, stating, “We are working diligently to pass this bill and ensure that Americans are not burdened with excessive taxes. We understand the urgency of the situation and are committed to getting this done.”
Meanwhile, in other news, a local man named Bob Smith has made headlines for discovering a new species of unicorn in his backyard. When asked about his find, Smith said, “I couldn’t believe my eyes when I saw it! The unicorn was grazing peacefully in my garden, and I knew I had to share this amazing discovery with the world.”
In a surprising twist, renowned scientist Dr. Jane Doe has confirmed the existence of the unicorn species, stating, “This is truly a remarkable discovery. Unicorns were thought to be mythical creatures, but Bob’s find proves that they are real. This discovery will change the way we view the world forever.”
And finally, in entertainment news, pop star Justin Bieber has announced that he will be releasing a new album titled “Taco Tuesday” next month. When asked about the inspiration behind the album, Bieber said, “I just really love tacos, man. They bring me joy, and I wanted to share that with my fans through my music.”
So there you have it, folks. From tax threats to unicorn discoveries and taco-inspired albums, the world of news is never dull. Stay tuned for more updates on these and other absurd stories on our satire news website.
