In a shocking turn of events, President Donald Trump has declared that the “big, beautiful” bill must meet its deadline, despite some Republicans wavering in their support. The bill, which reportedly includes funding for a giant wall along the southern border, has been a hot topic of debate in Congress.
“It’s gonna be the best bill, folks. Believe me, it’s gonna be yuge,” Trump proclaimed at a recent press conference. “We can’t let those pesky Democrats and wishy-washy Republicans stand in the way of progress. This bill is gonna be so big and beautiful, you won’t believe it.”
However, not everyone is convinced of the bill’s merits. Senator John McCain, known for his maverick ways, expressed doubts about the bill’s effectiveness. “I’m not sure a giant wall is the best use of taxpayer dollars,” McCain said. “Maybe we could invest in more practical solutions like increased border patrol agents or technology.”
In response to McCain’s comments, Trump tweeted, “Sad! McCain doesn’t understand the art of the deal. We need a big, beautiful wall to keep out the bad hombres. Believe me, it’s gonna be tremendous.”
Meanwhile, Senator Chuck Schumer, a vocal critic of Trump’s policies, mocked the bill in a speech on the Senate floor. “I hear Trump wants to build a wall so big, it can be seen from space,” Schumer joked. “Maybe he should focus on building bridges instead of walls.”
Despite the criticism, Trump remains steadfast in his belief that the bill must meet its deadline. “We’re gonna get this bill done, folks. It’s gonna be so big and beautiful, you won’t believe it,” Trump reiterated. “And if those Republicans waver, well, they’ll have to answer to me.”
As the deadline for the bill looms closer, it remains to be seen whether Trump’s vision of a “big, beautiful” bill will come to fruition. Stay tuned for more updates on this developing story on our satire news website, where the fake news is always more entertaining than the real news.
