In a shocking turn of events, President Trump has announced that a groundbreaking agreement with Harvard University regarding international students may be on the horizon. According to sources close to the President, the agreement is set to be announced within the next week.
When asked about the specifics of the agreement, Trump responded with his usual flair for the dramatic, saying, “I’ve been in talks with Harvard’s Dean of Ridiculously Smart Stuff, Professor Smartypants, and let me tell you, we’ve come up with a tremendous plan. It’s going to be the best plan, believe me.”
The agreement comes on the heels of Harvard’s decision to move all classes online for the upcoming fall semester, a move that would have put many international students at risk of losing their visas. Trump, ever the negotiator, saw an opportunity to swoop in and save the day.
“I’ve always had a soft spot for international students,” Trump said. “They bring diversity and culture to our universities. Plus, they pay a lot of money in tuition, so it’s a win-win for everyone.”
Sources close to Harvard have confirmed that negotiations have been tense, with both sides digging in their heels on key issues. However, it seems that a compromise is finally within reach.
“I can’t reveal too much just yet, but let’s just say that Harvard is going to be very happy with the outcome,” Trump teased. “And as for me, well, let’s just say I’ll be adding another trophy to my impressive collection of deal-making victories.”
While the specifics of the agreement remain shrouded in mystery, one thing is for certain – the world will be watching as Trump and Harvard come together to solve one of the most pressing issues facing international students today.
Stay tuned for more updates on this developing story, and remember folks, when it comes to international students, nobody negotiates better than Trump. Believe me.
