In a shocking turn of events, President Donald Trump is reportedly set to sign an executive order ending US sanctions on Syria. The move has left political analysts scratching their heads and wondering if Trump has finally lost his marbles.
According to a White House insider, Trump believes that lifting the sanctions will help improve relations with Syrian President Bashar al-Assad. When asked for comment, Trump allegedly said, “I love Assad, he’s a great guy. We share a love for strongmen leaders and terrible hairpieces.”
The decision has sparked outrage among members of Congress, with Senator Chuck Schumer declaring, “This is the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard. Trump is like a toddler in a candy store, except instead of candy, it’s dangerous foreign policy decisions.”
But not everyone is opposed to the move. Russian President Vladimir Putin reportedly called Trump to offer his congratulations, saying, “Well done, my friend. Now we can finally have that double date with Assad and Kim Jong Un.”
Meanwhile, Syrian citizens are said to be cautiously optimistic about the news. One Damascus resident, who asked to remain anonymous, told our reporter, “I mean, it can’t be worse than being bombed by both sides, right?”
In a bizarre twist, former White House Press Secretary Sean Spicer weighed in on the issue, saying, “This is just another example of the mainstream media trying to make Trump look bad. I mean, have you seen his hair lately? Clearly, he knows what he’s doing.”
As the world waits for Trump to make the executive order official, one thing is certain: this presidency just keeps getting weirder and weirder. Stay tuned for more updates on this developing story, and remember, you can always count on us for the most ridiculous news on the web.
