In a shocking turn of events, Spain has officially rejected NATO’s anticipated 5% defense spending proposal, deeming it as “unreasonable” and “absolutely bonkers.” The Spanish government has made it clear that they will not be bullied into spending more on defense than they already do on tapas and sangria.
In a press conference held in Madrid, Spanish Defense Minister, Juan Martínez, stated, “We refuse to be held hostage by NATO’s demands. We have better things to spend our money on, like building more roundabouts and hosting siesta competitions.”
When asked for further clarification on Spain’s decision, Prime Minister Pedro Sánchez added, “We simply cannot justify spending more on defense when we have perfectly good flamenco dancers who can distract any potential threats with their mesmerizing moves.”
NATO Secretary General, Jens Stoltenberg, expressed his disappointment in Spain’s decision, stating, “It is concerning that Spain is not taking its defense obligations seriously. We cannot rely on just paella and bullfighting to protect our borders.”
However, Spain remains unfazed by the criticism, with renowned Spanish comedian, Pablo Escobar, chiming in with his own thoughts on the matter, “Ay caramba! NATO needs to chill out and enjoy a nice siesta like the rest of us. Maybe then they’ll understand why we can’t be bothered with their silly demands.”
As tensions continue to rise between Spain and NATO, it remains to be seen how this standoff will play out. Will Spain budge on their defense spending or will they continue to stand their ground with a glass of sangria in hand? Only time will tell.
In the meantime, Spanish citizens are urged to remain calm and carry on with their daily fiestas, as the fate of their defense spending hangs in the balance. Viva España!
