In a shocking turn of events, Oversight Chair, Rep. Adam Schiff, has demanded that former White House staff, including Cedric Jean-Pierre, testify on an alleged cover-up of President Biden’s mental decline.
According to sources close to the situation, Schiff is convinced that there is a conspiracy at play to hide Biden’s cognitive decline from the American people. In a statement released to the press, Schiff exclaimed, “We cannot let this go unnoticed! The American people deserve to know the truth about their President’s mental state, even if that means dragging Cedric Jean-Pierre and others in front of Congress to spill the beans.”
When reached for comment, Jean-Pierre, who served as a senior advisor to President Biden, denied any involvement in a cover-up, stating, “I have no idea what Schiff is talking about. President Biden is as sharp as ever, just ask him yourself!”
However, the Oversight Chair remains undeterred in his quest for answers. In a recent press conference, Schiff declared, “We will leave no stone unturned in our investigation. We will get to the bottom of this alleged cover-up, even if it means calling in fake names like Joe Schmoe and Sally Sells Seashells to testify.”
The news of Schiff’s demands has sent shockwaves through Washington, with many wondering if this is just another political stunt or a legitimate concern. One anonymous source within the White House quipped, “I can’t believe this is happening. It’s like a bad soap opera, except it’s real life!”
As the drama unfolds, one thing is for certain – the American people are in for a wild ride as the truth about Biden’s mental decline cover-up is brought to light. Stay tuned for more updates on this developing story, and remember, you heard it here first at the number one source of satire news on the web!
