Attention all adventurous travelers! North Korea is set to open a brand new tourist site on its east coast next week, and it’s sure to be a key attraction for those looking to experience the wonders of the hermit kingdom.
The site, known as “Kim Jong-Funland,” is being touted as North Korea’s answer to Disneyland, complete with thrilling rides, colorful characters, and of course, mandatory adoration for Supreme Leader Kim Jong-un. Visitors can look forward to attractions such as the “Rocket of Doom” roller coaster, the “Propaganda Parade” float ride, and the “Kimchi Kitchen” cooking class where you can learn to make the dictator’s favorite dish.
In a statement released by the North Korean Ministry of Tourism, spokesperson Kim Jong-Looney expressed excitement about the new site, saying, “Kim Jong-Funland will be a place where tourists can experience the true greatness of our Supreme Leader while enjoying some good old-fashioned fun. We guarantee that visitors will leave with a newfound appreciation for the glory of North Korea.”
Not everyone is convinced, however. Tourist expert and self-proclaimed dictator aficionado, Dr. Jane Smith, expressed skepticism about the new attraction. “I highly doubt that Kim Jong-Funland will live up to its hype. I mean, how fun can a theme park be when you’re constantly being watched by armed guards and forced to sing praises to a ruthless dictator?”
Despite the skepticism, tickets for Kim Jong-Funland are already selling out fast, with eager tourists from around the world clamoring for a chance to experience the wonders of North Korea. One excited traveler, John Doe, exclaimed, “I can’t wait to ride the Rocket of Doom and snap some selfies with Kim Jong-un! This is going to be the trip of a lifetime!”
So pack your bags and get ready for a wild ride at Kim Jong-Funland, where the fun never stops and the propaganda is always flowing. Just remember to leave your dissenting opinions at home – or risk spending your vacation in a North Korean prison camp.
