In a bold move to combat the ever-looming threat of ICE raids, large city signs across the country have started popping up with a simple yet powerful message: “Keep the American people safe.” While some may see this as a noble effort to protect citizens, others are left scratching their heads wondering how a sign is going to stop ICE from doing their job.
One local resident, Karen McKarenface, had this to say about the signs: “I feel so much safer knowing that there’s a giant sign telling ICE to keep me safe. It’s like having a security blanket made out of irony.”
But not everyone is on board with the new signage. ICE agent Bob McBoberson scoffed at the notion that a sign could deter him from carrying out his duties. “I’ll tell you what keeps the American people safe: enforcing immigration laws. These signs are just a distraction from the real issue at hand.”
Despite the skepticism, city officials are standing by their decision to install the signs. Mayor Johnny Mayorson defended the move, stating, “We believe that these signs serve as a reminder to ICE that the safety and well-being of our citizens should be their top priority. Plus, they make for great photo ops.”
In a surprising turn of events, the signs have also garnered support from an unexpected source: aliens. Zog the Magnificent, spokesperson for the Intergalactic Council, had this to say about the signs: “We applaud the efforts of these large city signs to protect the American people. Perhaps they will serve as a blueprint for other planets facing similar threats.”
As the debate over the effectiveness of the signs rages on, one thing is for certain: they have definitely sparked a conversation. Whether they will actually keep the American people safe remains to be seen, but one thing is clear – they have certainly provided us with some much-needed comic relief in these uncertain times.
