In a shocking turn of events, former camp counselor, Bob “The Bear” Johnson, was arrested last week after allegedly threatening violent revenge on a Christian camp that fired him. Sources say Johnson was let go from Camp Holy Rollers after multiple complaints from campers about his unorthodox teaching methods, which included teaching archery with hot dogs as targets and leading sing-alongs of “Baby Got Back” around the campfire.
Johnson, who was known for his larger-than-life personality and penchant for mischief, reportedly snapped after being let go and vowed to “rain down hellfire on those holier-than-thou camp counselors.” Witnesses say he was seen storming out of the camp office, muttering about “taking matters into his own hands.”
In a statement to police, Johnson allegedly said, “Those sanctimonious camp counselors think they can just fire me and get away with it? Well, they’ve got another thing coming. I’ll show them what happens when you mess with The Bear!”
Camp Holy Rollers director, Reverend Sally Sunday, expressed shock at the news, stating, “We never expected Bob to react this way. We thought he was just a harmless goofball, but it seems we underestimated the depth of his anger.”
When reached for comment, Johnson’s lawyer, Saul Goodman, denied the allegations, stating, “My client is innocent until proven guilty. This is clearly a case of mistaken identity. Bob wouldn’t hurt a fly, let alone seek violent revenge on a Christian camp.”
Despite Goodman’s claims, Johnson was taken into custody and is currently awaiting trial. If convicted, he could face up to 10 years in prison for making terroristic threats.
In the meantime, Camp Holy Rollers has stepped up security measures to ensure the safety of its campers and staff. Reverend Sunday has assured parents that the camp is taking the situation seriously and is working with authorities to ensure a safe and peaceful summer camp experience.
As for Bob “The Bear” Johnson, only time will tell if his bark is worse than his bite. Let this be a lesson to all camp counselors out there – never underestimate the power of a disgruntled employee with a grudge and a knack for mischief.
