**White House Dismisses Reporter’s ‘Absurd’ Query on White South African Farmer Deaths: “Next Question, Please!”**
In a press briefing that could only be described as a masterclass in dodging, the White House recently dismissed a reporter’s inquiry about the tragic deaths of white South African farmers as “absurd.” The question, posed by the ever-enthusiastic reporter Chuck “The Questionator” McGee, was met with a collective eye-roll from the press corps, followed by a spontaneous round of applause for the White House’s new “Next Question, Please!” policy.
“Look, we’re busy trying to figure out how to make the economy great again, not how to save farmers from a continent away,” said Press Secretary Karla “No Comment” Johnson, who was clearly more interested in her avocado toast than the plight of farmers. “Besides, we have enough problems here, like deciding whether to put ketchup on hot dogs or not.”
When pressed further, Johnson added, “If we start caring about every farmer in the world, we’ll never get to the important stuff, like why the Kardashians are still relevant.”
Meanwhile, McGee, undeterred by the lack of seriousness, responded, “I just thought it was a valid question! I mean, if we can’t talk about white farmers, what’s next? Not discussing the plight of the endangered ‘White House Goldfish’?”
As the briefing continued, the room erupted in laughter when a rogue intern accidentally spilled coffee on the podium, prompting Johnson to quip, “See? Even our coffee has more substance than that question!”
In a shocking twist, the White House later announced a new initiative: “Farmers Without Borders,” which aims to send American farmers to South Africa to teach them how to grow avocados. “It’s a win-win,” Johnson concluded, “because who doesn’t love guacamole?”
As the press corps left the briefing, one reporter was overheard saying, “I guess we’ll just have to stick to asking about the weather. At least it’s something we can all agree on—unless it’s raining avocados!”
