**ICE Director Demands Apology from Tim Walz Over ‘Modern-Day Gestapo’ Remarks: A Comedy of Errors**
In a shocking turn of events that has left the nation both amused and bewildered, ICE Director T. Rex McFrostbite has officially demanded an apology from Minnesota Governor Tim Walz for his recent comments likening ICE to a “modern-day Gestapo.” McFrostbite, who is known for his love of ice fishing and his collection of novelty snow globes, stated, “I mean, come on! We’re not even close to being as organized as the Gestapo. Have you seen our paperwork? It’s a mess!”
Walz, who was busy perfecting his “I’m not a dictator, I swear” face, responded with a chuckle, “I’m sorry, but if you’re going to dress like a villain from a 1980s action movie, you can’t be surprised when people start making comparisons.” He then added, “Besides, I thought we were all in agreement that the real modern-day Gestapo is the guy who invented pineapple on pizza.”
In a bizarre twist, McFrostbite’s press conference was interrupted by a rogue ice cream truck that blared “Ice Ice Baby” while distributing free popsicles to the gathered reporters. “See? We’re just here to chill!” shouted the driver, who later identified himself as “Chilly Willy.”
As the ice cream truck drove off into the sunset, McFrostbite concluded, “I just want to be clear: we’re not the Gestapo. We’re more like the overzealous mall cops of immigration enforcement. And if anyone deserves an apology, it’s the poor souls who have to deal with our endless paperwork!”
In the end, both sides agreed to meet for a friendly game of ice hockey to settle their differences. “I’ll bring the pucks, you bring the apologies,” Walz quipped, as he skated away, leaving McFrostbite to ponder the true meaning of “modern-day Gestapo” while munching on a popsicle.
