**Woman at Risk of Rare Spinal Condition Due to Yoga Pose Causing Slipped Discs: Experts Recommend More Netflix Instead**
In a shocking turn of events, local yoga enthusiast and self-proclaimed “flexibility guru,” Linda Stretchmore, 32, has been diagnosed with a rare spinal condition after attempting the “Inverted Flamingo” pose during a particularly intense yoga class. The pose, which involves balancing on one leg while simultaneously trying to remember your ex’s birthday, has been linked to an alarming number of slipped discs among practitioners.
“I thought I was just going to find my inner peace,” said Stretchmore, who now finds herself in a battle with her own spine. “Instead, I found my inner chiropractor. I didn’t even know I had a disc to slip!”
Dr. Flexi McBackpain, a leading expert in yoga-related injuries, stated, “This is a classic case of yoga gone wrong. We recommend that people stick to more traditional forms of exercise, like binge-watching Netflix or aggressively scrolling through social media. At least those activities come with a lower risk of injury.”
In a bizarre twist, Stretchmore’s yoga instructor, Guru Namaste, defended the pose, claiming, “The Inverted Flamingo is a spiritual journey. Sure, it may lead to a few slipped discs, but it also opens the door to enlightenment—or at least a really good Instagram post.”
As Stretchmore prepares for her upcoming spinal surgery, she remains optimistic. “I’m just glad I didn’t try the ‘Upside-Down Pretzel’ pose. I hear that one can lead to spontaneous interpretive dance.”
In the meantime, experts are urging yoga enthusiasts everywhere to consider safer alternatives, like knitting or competitive napping, to avoid the perils of the yoga mat. After all, who needs a healthy spine when you can have a cozy blanket and a good show?
