**Developer to Restart NY Offshore Wind Project Following Trump Administration’s Lift of Pause: “We Just Needed a Little Wind in Our Sails!”**
In a shocking turn of events that has left environmentalists and conspiracy theorists alike scratching their heads, the New York Offshore Wind Project is set to restart after the Trump administration lifted its pause on the initiative. Developers are now claiming that they were just waiting for the right “breeze” to blow their way.
“We were just sitting around, twiddling our thumbs, waiting for the wind to change,” said project manager Sandy Breezington, who is known for his uncanny ability to predict weather patterns based on the behavior of local pigeons. “Now that the pause is lifted, we’re ready to harness the power of the wind—hopefully without it blowing our plans away!”
The project, which aims to generate clean energy from the ocean, was previously stalled due to concerns that it might interfere with the migratory patterns of seagulls who were apparently “very busy” with their Instagram accounts. “We didn’t want to upset the seagulls,” Breezington added. “They can be quite vocal when they don’t get their way. Have you ever heard a seagull squawk? It’s like a thousand angry toddlers.”
Former President Trump, who recently tweeted, “Wind is just air that’s really excited,” has been a vocal supporter of the project’s revival. “I love wind! It’s like the ocean’s way of giving you a high-five,” he said during a press conference held on a yacht that was definitely not a prop. “And let’s be honest, who doesn’t want to see a bunch of giant pinwheels spinning in the ocean? It’s like a carnival, but for energy!”
As the project gears up for its second chance, local residents are cautiously optimistic. “I just hope they don’t build those turbines too close to my beach,” said local beachgoer Sandy Shores. “I don’t want to be dodging windmills while trying to catch some rays. I’m here for the tan, not the turbine!”
With the wind at their backs and a questionable amount of enthusiasm, the developers are ready to set sail on this new chapter. “We’re going to make wind energy great again!” Breezington declared, as he donned a hard hat that suspiciously resembled a sailor’s cap. “And if it doesn’t work out, at least we’ll have some really cool photos for Instagram.”
Stay tuned as we follow this story, and remember: when life gives you wind, make energy!
