In a shocking turn of events, skeptics are raising eyebrows and popcorn bags over the latest news that James Cameron’s upcoming blockbuster, “Avatar 3,” will reportedly include an additional 10,000 hours of CGI. Critics are questioning whether this is a cinematic necessity or just a ploy to keep audiences glued to their seats until the next millennium.
“Honestly, I thought we were done with the blue people after the first two movies,” said local couch potato and self-proclaimed film critic, Bob “The Recliner” Johnson. “But if they’re adding 10,000 more hours of CGI, I’m pretty sure I’ll need to invest in a catheter.”
James Cameron
Cameron, known for his groundbreaking use of technology and his ability to make audiences feel emotions they didn’t know they had, has reportedly been working around the clock to ensure that “Avatar 3” will be the most visually stunning experience since the invention of the kaleidoscope. “We’re not just pushing boundaries; we’re obliterating them,” Cameron said in a recent press conference, while simultaneously juggling three holographic Na’vi characters. “If you thought the first two films were long, just wait until you see the runtime of this one. It’s going to be like watching a sloth run a marathon—slow, but you won’t want to look away.”
However, skeptics are not convinced. “I mean, how much more can you do with CGI?” questioned Dr. Ima Skeptic, a leading expert in the field of over-the-top visual effects. “At this point, I wouldn’t be surprised if they just start CGI-ing in entire new planets. What’s next? ‘Avatar 4: The Search for More Money’?”
In a bizarre twist, some fans have taken to social media to express their concerns. One Twitter user, @NaViFanatic, tweeted, “If I wanted to watch 10,000 hours of CGI, I’d just stare at my computer screen while my cat knocks over my coffee. #Avatar3 #NotImpressed.” Meanwhile, another user, @CouchPotatoKing, suggested that the film should be released in a new format: “Why not just stream it live for 10,000 hours? I’d pay to watch that! #RealityTVMeetsSciFi.”
As the debate rages on, one thing is clear: the anticipation for “Avatar 3” is reaching new heights, much like the Na’vi’s favorite tree. Whether it will be a visual masterpiece or a CGI overload remains to be seen. But one thing is certain: if you plan on watching it, you might want to bring a snack, a blanket, and a good book—just in case.
In the end, as Cameron himself put it, “We’re not just making a movie; we’re creating an experience. And if that experience includes 10,000 hours of CGI, then so be it. Just remember to hydrate, folks!”
So grab your 3D glasses and prepare for a cinematic journey that may or may not include a blue cat riding a flying whale. Because if there’s one thing we can all agree on, it’s that when it comes to “Avatar 3,” the sky’s the limit—or at least, the limit is somewhere around 10,000 hours of CGI.
