**FDA Greenlights Novavax COVID-19 Vaccine with Unique Limitations: A Shot in the Dark!**
In a groundbreaking move that has left the world scratching its head, the FDA has officially greenlit the Novavax COVID-19 vaccine, but with a twist that could only be described as “uniquely limiting.” The vaccine, which is said to be 100% effective in preventing COVID-19 in a parallel universe, comes with a set of restrictions that would make even the most seasoned bureaucrat raise an eyebrow.
According to Dr. Ima Quack, a self-proclaimed vaccine expert and part-time magician, “This vaccine is like a Swiss Army knife—if the knife was made of rubber and only worked on Tuesdays.” The FDA has mandated that the Novavax vaccine can only be administered during a full moon, while wearing socks on your hands, and only to people who can recite the entire alphabet backward. “It’s all about making sure the vaccine is taken seriously,” Dr. Quack added, while pulling a rabbit out of a hat.
In a press conference that was more circus than science, FDA spokesperson Pat O’Puns stated, “We believe these limitations will not only enhance the vaccine’s effectiveness but also provide a fun challenge for the public. Who doesn’t want to juggle while getting vaccinated?”
The vaccine is also rumored to come with a complimentary set of glow-in-the-dark stickers, which are said to ward off any potential side effects, including spontaneous dance parties and an uncontrollable urge to sing show tunes. “I got the shot, and now I can’t stop singing ‘Let It Go’ in the grocery store,” said local resident Betty Bop, who is now considering a career in musical theater.
As the world waits with bated breath for the rollout of this “revolutionary” vaccine, one thing is clear: Novavax is here to make vaccination fun again—one bizarre limitation at a time!
