**Trump Officials Tour Major Alaska Oil Field as Drilling Expansion Efforts Intensify: “We’re Just Here for the Free Snacks!”**
In a move that has left environmentalists shaking their heads and polar bears rolling their eyes, a group of Trump officials recently embarked on a grand tour of Alaska’s major oil field, armed with hard hats, oversized sunglasses, and an insatiable appetite for fossil fuels—and snacks.
“Look, we’re not just here to drill,” said former Energy Secretary Rick Perry, who was spotted trying to catch a fish with a plastic straw. “We’re also here to enjoy the breathtaking views of… well, oil rigs. And if they have free snacks, count me in!”
The tour, dubbed “Drill, Baby, Drill: The Snack Edition,” featured a series of photo ops where officials posed with giant oil drills while munching on complimentary moose jerky. “I’ve never seen a moose, but I’m pretty sure they taste like freedom,” quipped Kellyanne Conway, who was busy trying to convince a local walrus to endorse the administration’s drilling policies.
Meanwhile, Secretary of the Interior, Deb Haaland, was reportedly seen trying to negotiate a peace treaty with a group of disgruntled caribou. “I told them we’d only drill on Tuesdays and Thursdays, but they just stared at me like I was a bad Netflix series,” she lamented.
As the officials reveled in their oil-soaked adventure, one unnamed aide was overheard saying, “If we can’t drill for oil, at least we can drill for snacks. I mean, have you tried the crab cakes? They’re to die for!”
With drilling expansion efforts intensifying, one thing is clear: Alaska may soon be known not just for its breathtaking landscapes, but also for its all-you-can-eat oil buffet. As the tour wrapped up, Trump himself tweeted, “Alaska: Where the oil flows like my tweets—endlessly and with questionable consequences!”
Stay tuned for more updates as the administration continues its quest for both oil and the perfect snack!
