**Florida GOP Proposes Bill to Cement Trump’s Orders for US Industry Dominance: A New Era of “Yuge” Legislation!**
In a move that has left political analysts scratching their heads and local alligators rolling their eyes, the Florida GOP has proposed a bill that aims to cement former President Donald Trump’s orders for U.S. industry dominance. Dubbed the “Make America Yuge Again” bill, it promises to turn Florida into the “Silicon Swamp” of the South.
State Senator Chuck “The Alligator Whisperer” McGuffin, who introduced the bill, stated, “We’re not just going to make America great again; we’re going to make it so great that even the alligators will be wearing tiny suits and running for office!” McGuffin went on to explain that the bill includes provisions for mandatory “Trump Tuesdays,” where all businesses must play “Macho Man” by the Village People on repeat while serving only orange foods.
Critics of the bill, including local resident and self-proclaimed “Florida Man” Gary “Gatorade” Johnson, argue that it’s a waste of time. “I just want to fish and drink beer, not listen to a bunch of politicians talk about making my state a giant Trump-themed amusement park,” he said while wearing a shirt that read, “I’m with Stupid” and pointing at his friend.
The bill also proposes a new state mascot: a giant inflatable Trump that will float down the St. Johns River, providing both entertainment and a reminder of the “good old days.” “It’s like a parade, but with more hair,” said local artist and inflatable designer, Betty “Bubbles” McFadden.
As the bill makes its way through the legislature, one thing is clear: Florida is ready to take its place as the epicenter of “Yuge” industry dominance, one inflatable Trump at a time. Stay tuned for updates, and remember, if you see an alligator in a suit, you might just be in Florida!
