**Slovakia’s Central Bank Governor Found Guilty of Bribery: “I Thought It Was a Tip Jar!” Claims Official**
In a shocking turn of events that has left Slovakia reeling, the Central Bank Governor, Jozef “Cash Me Outside” Kollar, was found guilty of bribery and slapped with a hefty $225,000 fine. Kollar, who was previously known for his impeccable financial acumen, now finds himself in a situation that even his accountant, Maria “I Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter” Novák, described as “a little sticky.”
The scandal erupted when investigators discovered Kollar had been accepting bribes disguised as “donations” to his personal “Bank of Kollar.” When asked about the allegations, Kollar exclaimed, “I thought it was a tip jar! You know, like at a coffee shop! I was just trying to brew some good relations!”
In a bizarre twist, Kollar’s defense attorney, Igor “I’m Not a Crook” Pospisil, argued that the money was actually a “cultural exchange” program. “In Slovakia, we have a rich tradition of giving and receiving… especially when it comes to cash,” he stated, while nervously eyeing the nearest exit.
The court’s decision has sparked outrage among Slovak citizens, many of whom are now demanding a new currency: the “Kollar,” which they claim should be worth “at least a cup of coffee and a donut.”
Meanwhile, Kollar has vowed to appeal the decision, stating, “I’m just trying to keep the economy ‘in the black’—and I thought that meant cash under the table!”
As Slovakia braces for the fallout, one thing is clear: the only thing more inflated than Kollar’s ego is the price of coffee in Bratislava.
