**Trump Open to Meeting Putin and Zelenskyy to Discuss War Negotiations: “I’ll Bring the Snacks!”**
In a shocking turn of events that has left political analysts scratching their heads and conspiracy theorists high-fiving, former President Donald Trump announced he is “totally open” to meeting with Russian President Vladimir Putin and Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelenskyy to discuss peace negotiations. “I’ve got the best ideas, folks. Tremendous ideas,” Trump declared while holding a half-eaten Big Mac. “And I’ll bring the snacks! Who doesn’t love snacks?”
Sources close to Trump revealed that he plans to host the meeting at his Mar-a-Lago resort, where he will serve “the finest fast food” and “maybe some of that fancy Ukrainian borscht if Zelenskyy is nice.” Trump added, “I hear it’s red, like my ties. Very classy!”
When asked about his negotiation strategy, Trump confidently stated, “I’ll just tell them both that I’m the best negotiator in the world. I mean, I wrote the book on it! Well, I didn’t write it, but I did read it. Twice!”
Meanwhile, Zelenskyy responded with cautious optimism, saying, “If it means peace, I’m willing to try anything—even if it involves a side of fries.” Putin, on the other hand, simply grunted and flexed his muscles, which many interpreted as a sign of approval.
Political experts are baffled by the potential meeting, with Dr. Ima Quack, a leading analyst at the Institute of Unlikely Outcomes, stating, “This could either lead to world peace or a new reality show called ‘The Apprentice: Global Edition.’ Either way, I’m tuning in!”
As the world holds its breath, one thing is clear: if there’s one thing that can unite world leaders, it’s a shared love for greasy food and questionable negotiation tactics. Stay tuned for updates, and remember, folks—peace is just a burger away!
