**AOC Raises Funds to Abolish ICE During Trump’s Immigration Crackdown: A Comedy of Errors**
In a bold move that has left political analysts scratching their heads and comedians rolling on the floor, Congresswoman Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (AOC) has launched a fundraising campaign to abolish ICE, just as President Trump’s immigration crackdown reaches peak absurdity. The campaign, titled “ICE, Ice, Baby (Please Don’t Come Back),” aims to raise $10 million to replace the agency with a team of friendly neighborhood ice cream trucks.
“Why chase people down when you can just offer them a scoop of mint chocolate chip?” AOC quipped during a press conference, while wearing a shirt that read “I’m Just Here for the Gelato.” “We believe in a world where everyone can enjoy a sundae without the fear of deportation. Plus, who doesn’t love sprinkles?”
The campaign has attracted a motley crew of supporters, including former White House Press Secretary Sean Spicer, who stated, “I’m all for abolishing ICE, but can we keep the ‘I’ for ‘Ice Cream’? I mean, have you tried the new pistachio flavor?”
Meanwhile, Trump responded with his usual flair, tweeting, “AOC wants to replace ICE with ice cream trucks? Sad! I prefer my immigration policies like my coffee: strong and bitter!”
As the fundraising efforts continue, AOC has promised that every dollar raised will go towards hiring “Ice Cream Ambassadors” who will not only serve delicious treats but also provide free hugs and motivational speeches about the importance of community. “We’re calling it ‘Hugs Not Thugs,’” she added, while a nearby ice cream truck blasted “Under Pressure” by Queen.
In a surprising twist, the campaign has also attracted the attention of a group of rogue penguins who have expressed interest in joining the movement. “We’re all about inclusivity,” said Captain Flippers, the self-appointed leader of the penguin brigade. “And we know a thing or two about cold environments!”
As the nation watches this ice cream-fueled political spectacle unfold, one thing is clear: whether you’re for or against AOC’s plan, you can’t deny that the only thing melting faster than the ice cream is the political tension.
