**World’s Longest Purpose-Built Cycling Tunnel Opens in Norway: Cyclists Rejoice, Cars Weep**
In a groundbreaking development that has left the world both baffled and mildly amused, Norway has officially opened the world’s longest purpose-built cycling tunnel, stretching a staggering 15.3 miles. The tunnel, affectionately dubbed “The Pedal Palace,” is designed to provide cyclists with a safe and scenic route while simultaneously giving cars a reason to weep into their steering wheels.
Local cyclist and self-proclaimed “Tunnel Visionary,” Lars Pedalsson, exclaimed, “Finally! A place where I can ride my bike without worrying about pesky things like traffic lights or, you know, other people!” He added, “I’ve always dreamed of cycling in a dark, damp tunnel. It’s like being in a really long, really boring roller coaster!”
The tunnel features state-of-the-art amenities, including mood lighting, motivational quotes plastered on the walls, and a snack bar that serves only organic kale smoothies. “We wanted to create an experience,” said chief tunnel architect, Greta Greenbike. “Nothing says ‘freedom’ like pedaling through a dark, echoing cavern while contemplating your life choices.”
However, not everyone is thrilled about the new tunnel. Local car enthusiast, Bjorn Vroom, lamented, “I used to enjoy the thrill of driving through the scenic fjords. Now I’m stuck behind a herd of cyclists in a tunnel! What’s next? A bike lane on the moon?”
Despite the mixed reactions, the tunnel has already become a tourist hotspot, with visitors flocking to experience the thrill of cycling in a place that feels suspiciously like a giant hamster tube. As one tourist put it, “I came for the cycling, but I stayed for the existential dread!”
So, if you find yourself in Norway and are looking for a unique way to embrace your inner cyclist—or simply want to ponder life’s big questions in a dark tunnel—The Pedal Palace awaits. Just remember to bring your kale smoothie and a flashlight!
