**A Midnight Reflection: The Speaker of the House’s Moment of Prayer at 3 a.m.**
In a shocking turn of events that has left the nation both bewildered and mildly amused, Speaker of the House, Kevin McCarthy, was spotted at 3 a.m. in the Capitol building, deep in prayer. Witnesses claim he was kneeling in front of a giant portrait of George Washington, muttering something about “the spirit of bipartisanship” and “where did I leave my coffee?”
Sources close to the Speaker revealed that McCarthy had been wrestling with a particularly tough decision: whether to support a bill on infrastructure or to finally address the pressing issue of the Capitol’s snack bar running out of nacho cheese. “I just felt like I needed divine intervention,” McCarthy reportedly said, “or at least a good taco truck.”
As he prayed, aides overheard him saying, “Dear Lord, grant me the wisdom of Lincoln, the charm of Reagan, and the ability to dodge questions like a seasoned politician.” One aide, who wished to remain anonymous, added, “He also asked for a miracle to make the Senate actually listen to him. I mean, good luck with that!”
In a bizarre twist, the Speaker’s late-night reflection was interrupted by a group of sleep-deprived interns who mistook him for a statue and attempted to take selfies with him. “I thought it was a new art installation,” said intern Sally McFadden. “I mean, who wouldn’t want a picture with a praying politician at 3 a.m.?”
As dawn broke over the Capitol, McCarthy emerged from his moment of prayer looking slightly more enlightened and a lot more confused. “I think I’m ready to tackle the nacho cheese crisis,” he declared, before promptly tripping over a stray legislative bill and falling into a pile of unfiled paperwork.
In the end, the Speaker’s midnight reflection may not have solved any pressing issues, but it did provide a much-needed reminder that even in the halls of power, sometimes all you need is a little prayer—and a lot of nachos.
